opposite of birth
march 26, 2005
^ photos taken at rose hills
in life, there is birth and there is also the opposite end, death. although this week i spoke of my niece's arrival, i opted to not speak of the passing of a relative that took place. perhaps it's superstitious of me to not taint the good with the bad but i wanted to remain quiet about that aspect until i was able to attend the services today.
i sat there in the chapel today listening to my cousin give the eulogy. his voice was so steady and calm as he relayed his memories of the loved one. i usually do not get emotional at funerals as i have not really truly been to a funeral of one who is so extremely close to me. sure, i've shed a tear or two just because there is a sense of sadness but not truly sobbing to the point of uncontrolled emotions.
i found myself looking out the glass windows overlooking the views of east los angeles as the life of someone i knew was described over the loudspeaker - a very hard life unfolding before all those who sat there listening:
born in a small village in toisan. at age 16 married an abc who returned back to china to find a wife. bore 2 sons. husband returned back to the states without her. husband left her and their 2 sons to their own devices without support. world war 2. re-education labor camp under communist china. lost all her rightful property as a landowner. moved to hong kong in her 50's. moved to america in her 70's. didn't speak a word of english yet took buses all around los angeles. brain tumor in her 80's. saying goodbye at 95 from a second tumor in the brain.
i only really met her when she moved to los angeles. i remember in recent years sitting at her kitchen table as she poured me tea and brought me a plate of biscuits to munch on while she sat down adjacent to me and talked story. with my extremely minimal toisanese comprehension, i politely just nodded and smiled as she continued on. i still don't know how i got by answering the questions she asked of me, but somehow i just did. she was always so kind and smiling with her crinkly wrinkled face sitting before me.
i imagine her to be what my maternal grandmother would have been like if i had ever met her.
:: ::
and some random photos, just because.
my colleague recently bought me this framed print of cinderella and her prince just because she wanted to remind me that fairy tales aren't all just fairy tales and that sometimes they really come true.
i rarely order a nigiri sushi dinner set just because i usually end up regretting eating it since it's too cold. at the time of ordering, i am craving it but i always end up needing something super hot to balance the chill of it. and yes, i ended up regretting ordering this even though it looks yummy.
a sneaky pic of my neighbor's yard just because this is what suburbia los angeles looks like. i'm truly envious of their place.
this photo makes me laugh just because g looks like she's trying to explain something to fishpimp and fishpimp looks like she is cracking her knuckles getting ready to clobber g. of course it's all just...looks.
currently listening to: nick lowe, cruel to be kind
